I’ve caught the plague! Or some sort of sore throat/bad cold type thing anyway.
Typical!
Not too bad seen as I had taken the next two weeks as me time but still!
Anyone who had arranged to see me over the next few days please get in touch and I will make myself available next week instead. For those who wanted to see me next week and I originally said no… Let the boys I’m cancelling on get in on it first eh?
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Hope you’re all feeling better than me!
Laura
Xx
There are a couple of things I’ve yet to do.
Number 1 – have a bi mmf threesome, it’s something I’ve wanted to do for aaaages. If you fancy it give me an email, if you’re bi and want to give it a go or if there are actually two of you! Not for the straight minded 
Experimenters welcome!
Number 2 – have someone watch a session. It’s something I’ve been asked to do many times, but only ever the person who wants to watch so, if you fancy being watched let me know and I’m sure we could set something up.
There was a third but now I’ve forgotten it, bla, I’m too blonde sometimes!
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Also, as a little goodbye to all of you I’ve seen before, be it regularly or not so much but we’ve gotten on well, how about a nice long lingering session to say goodbye? An overnight for £450 (+cab there please) or £50 off a 2 hour + session.
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Laura
xx
The trip I was going on has been canceled, so I’ll be around a bit longer than planned, until about 28th July.
ps, I’ve also got some nuru gel!
I wasn’t going to get any more nuru massage before my ‘retirement’, I’ve been hesitating that I’m going to land with a bloody expensive bottle of gel and no use for it.
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Fortunately (for those who’re after it), I’ve been getting so many emails and calls that I decided to just get some. It should be here Friday/Saturday, I’ll only be ordering two bottles so it’s probably best to let me know quite soon if you want to indulge before I bugger off into the tart sunset.
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Laura
xx
It’s been a while since I’ve updated – sorry! I’ve been off all over the country and organizing different things recently which has taken a lot of the time I normally spend with you boys.
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Anyway! My point is that it’s soon going to take all my time away, I’ll be retiring in a couple of weeks to concentrate on other things.
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I don’t have an exact date but am looking at around 17th July provisionally.
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Next week is going to be rather busy for me personally as I have a visitor so if you’d like to indulge together then it’s best to get in touch soon. For the week after I’m trying to leave myself quite open as I know there are some of you finding it a bit difficult for us to arrange a get together lately. However if you’d like a nuru massage I shan’t be available for these until later next week.
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Hoping to catch up with you all one last time!
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Laura
xx
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ps - realizing just how much ‘hooker stuff’ I have, way too many sex toys and barely (if even) worn lingerie.
I’m sure you’ll all be glad that my leg finally seems to be healed properly – even after a couple more mishaps with it at the weekend.
My laptop on the other hand doesn’t love me as much and has been on the blink again for a while – very irritating! So when I thought I had my phone stolen (or not, a friend of mine borrowed it at a house party and put it back in the wrong handbag), I nearly died! Not to worry, we have figured out what’s wrong with it, I just need to find the disk to fix it and I’ll be back online and paying attention to you all again. 
Anyway, I’ll leave you with a lovely newish report, intact I think it’s my first nuru massage one, so you now all know it’s not so bad.
://www.punternet.com/frs/fr_view.php?recnum=103005
Laura
Xx
Well, traditionally it’s a little Japanese girl sliding all over you (effortlessly, of course) covered in Nuru Gel, a colourless, scentless gel made from seaweed and camomile – nuru actually means slippery in Japanese, or so I hear.
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Fortunately I’m not all that petite, maybe a little short at most, so it takes a bit more effort on my part. Sometimes it’s a bit like a session at the gym. Great fun though, the gel feels fantastic, especially when it’s lovely and warm.
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To be honest, before I started doing nuru I didn’t really see the point in a massage as a prelude, but it’s actually great foreplay, and does add a little something to the lude act itself.
This site probably explains it a lot better than I could. (And I’m thinking of getting one of those Cupid’s couches… hmm)!
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I think the only problem is that I need to put something a little more relaxing on than Alexisonfire, and the ending up with nuru over my face.
Sorry for my ranting ways, 6am before I got back to sleep. Mice gnawing at my windows, the camp queens upstairs, a boiler which just doesn’t like me and a flatmate with a 5am tea fetish. Plus I’ve missed my appointment at the bank to ‘review’ my account, in other words (a whole) 5 months after the last time, they want to convince me to open more accounts/give them more money.
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Ah, and my flowers are dying… hint? The £3 ones from Tesco will do!
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Not the Amy Wino version, I preferred the Zutons but don’t go telling anyone!
I was woken up by a lovely phonecall I just had to answer to express my fondness for being disturbed. This, ahem, lovely gentleman, wanted me to go to his home asap and give him a nuru massage. Well, I’m afraid I had to mention the fact that even in the small hours of the morning I still don’t visit people in their homes and goodnight. Unfortunately he decided that I would, of course, be enticed with his offer of some cocaine and champagne. Now, being the hooker face that I am I immediately jumped out of bed and declared that I would be there in 10 minutes, I’ll just put a coat and some stilettos on. I was quite upset to realise as I was leaving that I forgot to take down his address – dang!
So off I headed back to bed, my lovely old worn out bed in my new flat where I tried to get back to sleep (ok, so I have the beautiful 500 thread count sheets but for this rent I deserve a decent bed)! Then, the boiler had different ideas and decided it would make an annoyance of itself and start making noises. The lovely new boiler I waited a month for and had to get up out of my uncomfortable bed but oh so soft sheets for at 8 am 4 days for decided I had to wait for some snooze.
Fandabydose!
Rant over.
So I’ve got a working laptop, fantastic! Unfortunately it ain’t great, but it works. The other one is still sitting sad and lonely, I can’t face sending it off for repair for all my memories to be deleted!
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Finally gotten rid of the silly manflu as well, but not before upsetting my eardrum. So when I go ‘what? eh? huh?’ blame that. It feels like I have water in my ear, all muffled and whatnot, but at least I have one working ear, and I suppose that’ll need to be enough for now. It’s leading to a lot more missed calls than usual, well, that and my terrible signal in the new flat. If I do miss you, give me a text as I’m forever running out of credit (come on, who has payg these days grr) but normally have some free texts to let you know you can call me back.
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Anyway, I’m running off to do a bit more decorating, it’s nearly finished, thankfully.
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Laura
Laura MacKenzie of London
